BRAWL!!

Go here: http://unspeakableevil.wordpress.com/syn/brawl/

That is all.

-Vyperchild

Pokerace FR/LG Introduction

http://unspeakableevil.wordpress.com/2010/02/26/pokmon-radio/

http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=324288865678&index=1

All the information should be in those links, and if you wish to join in you can comment with your progress to either of those pages.

As a summary, Unspeakable Evil are joining in on a pokemon race. The aim is to complete Pokémon FireRed or LeafGreen in the shortest time possible (measured by the in-game clock). This includes the Sevii Islands and the Super Elite 4. You can choose any starter you wish, but I and a few others chose to pick at random (I used a dice roll).

Other than to hopefully get people joining in, the point of this post is to start my personal log of the event. I will be updating probably daily with an account of times and progress. I will limit these posts to encompassing the journey between Gym Leaders etc. so for example, the first post will end with beating Brock, the second with beating Misty.

At the end I will collect all of the log for easy reading.

-Vyperchild

The Saboteur

After a long period of not posting on my own at Unspeakable Evil, I finally thought of something to write. So head on over and check out my review of The Saboteur.

 
-Vyperchild

That Borderlands Thingy

Last year I got Arkham Asylum. Then I got Borderlands before I finished Arkham Asylum. Then I finished Arkham Asylum. Then I couldn’t be bothered even installing Borderlands.

Then it was not last year anymore. And I was bored. Again.

So I took the Borderlands disc and installed it on my PC. My computer is good enough to run the game on low settings. The computer out in the study is better, but I couldn’t be bothered playing it on that.

Regardless, that brings us to me having the game available to play.

This game has been recommended to me by a bunch of people, whether they have played it or just seen some stuff and thought it looked pretty cool or whatever.

I have found the game pretty meh.

I realise that my opinion is against that of the general consensus about this game. However I’m not really saying the game is bad, just that it’s nothing particularly special.

My young cousin quite aptly pointed out similarities to Fallout 3 when she saw Borderlands for the first time, which is a fair assessment. The game feels a lot like Fallout 3. The differences are that it is perhaps a little more linear, and the graphics are weird.

The graphics (which for me aren’t as good as they should be because of my computer, but I still feel my following point is valid) are an awkward mix of realism and style. Everything has a fairly thick black border around it, and the character models almost look like they’re just really good sprites. This is because things such as wrinkles are drawn on the face in black, making them look like animated characters, but they’ve still tried to make them look like real people which, in my opinion, doesn’t work. The scenery is perhaps worse because the barren, worn-down badlands look quite realistic except for the striking and off-putting black borders. Overall the graphics just feel abnormal and unimpressive.

The game itself operates on a quest system. Fairly standard. Fairly repetitive. The game is just generally a copy of Fallout 3 with some humour thrown in. And some vehicles. The vehicles are pretty cool, I admit.

The difficulty for me is an issue. The game is mostly at a decent difficulty, but at certain points it throws enemies at you that are quite a few levels higher than you, and they can be a real bitch to beat. This is because when an enemy is a few levels above you, not only are they stronger and have more health than if they were your level, but they also receive less damage for seemingly no reason, as indicated by a warning triangle next to their health. I understand a stats based defence against the player’s attacks, but bonus defence just for being a few levels higher makes for some ludicrously hard (and usually sudden) fights.

Perhaps multiplayer is where this game is really meant to shine, but I haven’t tried it. Can’t be bothered/don’t have the capacity for it. Whatever.

In conclusion, I’ll keep playing the game. It’s nothing special, but it’s there, it’s decent and it means that when friends bring the game up in conversation I can contribute. And be attacked for disliking it.

-Vyperchild

Band Hero review

Over at Unspeakable Evil, I have put up a review for Band Hero. You will also be able to find our latest Meanwhile… comic and a couple of Let’s Plays by Esoteric and Forte.

-Vyperchild

Kingdom Hearts: 358/2 Days

Review here.

-Vyperchild

Rock Band 2

Last year, Guitar Hero: World Tour and Rock Band 2 were released. After much deliberation and review-reading, I decided that the best plan of action for myself would be to get the Guitar Hero instruments (Being made by Logitech, they are of better quality and completely compatible with games from both series, like Guitar Hero: Metallica) and the Rock Band 2 game, which features many songs from both games as well as some personal favourites such as Jethro Tull’s Aqualung and Kansas’ Carry On Wayward Son.

However, I put off purchasing anything late last year as Rock Band 2’s release was going to be pushed back.

That was okay.

It is now August and Rock Band 2 has still not been released here in Australia. The game will not be released here until the end of September.

Harmonix, WTF?!

I can understand Harmonix not wanting their products to compete, as Rock Band 1 was released here around the same time as World Tour was, but that was the company’s fault and if they were to release either game, it should have been the improved sequel, or release both games with the instruments being separate, or only with the sequel.

All that Harmonix has managed to do is ensure that they cannot properly compete with Guitar Hero in Europe and Australia. Good job guys.

What makes this even more grating is that the vast majority of Rock Band’s downloadable tracks are actually available for the Wii now. And there are some I really want, like Space Truckin’ and Pain Redefined.

-Vyperchild

** Seriously Harmonix, learn some fucking marketing. **

Holy Fuck.Warren Spector just became my new god.

Steampunk Mickey Mouse.

This is going to be fucking win.

Robot Goofy?! HELLS YEAH

Seven Dwarf face on a robot?! HELLS YEAH AGAIN.

This game, currently being referred to (appropriately) as ‘Epic Mickey’ is just about the best gaming news I’ve heard all year.

Disagree?

Well you’re fucking wrong cockhead.

-Vyperchild

** I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it. Please come back. **

FUCKING FUCK STEPHEN CONROY FUCK

Fuck. So. Fucking. Much. Fuck.

WELL!

That is to say, FUCK. Stupid fucking fuck.

Alright. The point. The fucking point. Fucking getting there.

SO! You know how I was saying about our no R-18+ games a little while ago? Well, I thought that some progress was being made what with all the commotion and opening the debate to the public.

WELL I WAS FUCKING WRONG.

We aren’t getting R-18+ games anytime soon. Okay. Disappointed but I could deal with it. After all, we can always import.

OH WAIT. NO WE FUCKING CAN’T.

The FUCKING government has decided that the internet is evil. They want to start blocking sites which host or sell R-rated games.

YES THAT’S RIGHT.

YOU’RE NOT GOING TO BE ALLOWED TO IMPORT.

Banning internet sites? What are we? FUCKING CHINA?

Fuck you Communications Minister Stephen Conroy.

FUCK YOU.

-Fucking Vyperchild

** At the moment, this is still something Labor is trying to get through the senate. As such, I am going to turn the senate into a gauntlet of horrors so terrible that Stephen Conroy will break down as the Labor party is whittled down in increasingly horrible ways and he will authorise the creation of a game based on running this wonderful gauntlet. You can never win. You can only die in ways so gory and original that no director would be able to film a horror movie with such content because they would find themselves coughing up blood at the mere thought. It will be awesome. Also, FUCK **

Don’t worry about Swine Flu, I have a plan!

I was playing some old Mega Drive/Genesis games when, suddenly, it came to me.

I KNOW HOW TO STOP SWINE FLU.

That’s right, I, Vyperchild, have discovered the answer you’ve all been searching for.

*applause*
*wolf whistles*
*thrown panties*

I am putting together an elite team with unparalleled knowledge and experience in dealing with such threats.

Allow me to introduce you to the leader of the team:

 
Hailing from the nation of Hyrule, the steadfast and silent Link has had more past lives than you could poke a deku stick at, and in each of them has gained much knowledge about swine from his battles with Moblins and the evil pig-lord Ganon (pictured). With a sword with enough power to cut through an evil as potent as Swine Flu, he will make a fine team leader.

The second member is none other than Sparkster:

Sparkster is an opossum. But don’t let his cute animal looks fool you! With his deadly shooting sword, his tough blue armour and a super jetpack, he’s one Rocket Knight who knows how to kick ass. His assistance to the team will mostly come in the form of dealing with the Swine Flu hordes and their monstrous pig-tanks and pig-robots.

The third team member is our driver:

He may just be a tiny monkey with a hat, but Diddy Kong’s driving skills are top notch. In fact, it was his ability to unerringly drive cars and hovercraft and fly planes that led to his victory over the enormous Wizpig. We have every confidence in Diddy’s ability to get the team where they need to be to stop Swine Flu.

The final member of the team is:

TOMBI! After his bracelet was stolen by some greedy Koma Pigs, Tombi started fighting a personal war with swine everywhere. Regardless of whether he has to tackle the swine or throw their magic asses into enchanted handbags, he always gets the job done.

Although, it must be noted that our scientists are currently investigating Tombi due to the possibility of his ‘rape’ combat technique being the origin of Swine Flu. 

AND THAT’S THE TEAM!

*applause*

However, we also have a reserve member in case the Swine Flu situation escalates:

With his experience in space combat against Pigma Dengar, Fox McCloud’s services shall be employed should Swine Flu begin to reach beyond Earth. Additionally, his Landmaster Tank may be employed to assist Sparkster in dealing with the mechanized swine forces.

Another reserve was considered, however it has been agreed that although Duke Nukem’s experience in killing Pig Cops could be beneficial, his inability to turn up on time would hinder the team’s efficiency.

-Vyperchild

** I have just been informed that no member of the team actually exists. I am sorry to say that when Spanky Ham and Babe attack, we are all DOOMED **