Archive for August, 2009

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Holidays woo!

August 31, 2009

Yay uni holidays.

Just like uni.

😀

-Vyperchild

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I’m on a boat, mother fuckers

August 30, 2009

I couldn’t update last night because I was too busy being:

QUOTE “The life of the party”

Sure, it was said in jest, but I’ll claim it. Anyway, I was on a boat (mother fucker). It was a playboy cruise. There were strippers!

I didn’t see them though.

There was also lots of being on a boat (mother fucker) at the pier. It took ages to leave, and then we ended up back at the pier to pick the strippers up and we were there for a while.

It must have been because of all the clothes they had to carry on. OH WAIT.

Speaking of clothes, it was a black and white semi-formal thing, and so I got to wear a suit. I didn’t go to my valedictory, so this was the first time in my life that I’d worn one.

I fucking love suits. I need some.

Anyway, yeah it was a fun night. And as someone who gets motion sickness, I was surprised that I was feeling fine. Must have been all the alcohol.

See? Even more benefits of alcohol. Drink up!

-Vyperchild, mother fuckers

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RE: RE: Alcomahol

August 28, 2009

Again I must post about alcohol. Sure, I didn’t drink so much tonight, but I had enough so as to converse with people I had never met, or met very briefly, on an intellectual level about topics of interest.

Such as Zelda.

and Mother 3.

and Brawl. BRAWL!!!

So yeah.

My point is (for the third time) that alcohol is a uniting force which brings people together who otherwise would not be together.

This may be relevant to teenage pregnancy, but whatever.

Anyway, alcohol makes for good conversation. In fact, even the conversation where I pointed out that cricket wasn’t a real sport and was thus shunned was a fun conversation.

COS ALCOHOL.

-Vyperchild

** Real sports include Aussie Rules Football, Ice Hockey and Baseball. Also, soccer to a lesser extent. **

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The Twilight Watch

August 27, 2009

The third and final book of the Night Watch trilogy (but as I’ve been informed, there is a sequel to the series, named The Final Watch, which I now have to fucking find). I’ve got to say, this is probably the weakest book of the three, although it was still enjoyable.

The book returns main character status to Anton, and begins with a story about a human who will potentially be turned into an Other. Not a vampire or a werewolf though, a proper magician. This was thought to be impossible, but Anton is sent to investigate. However, Anton also works alongside Day Watch member Kostya (who first appeared in The Night Watch) and a pair of Inquisitors (both appeared in The Day Watch). This story is quite fun, but leaves more loose threads than previous mid-book stories had, which was somewhat annoying.

The second story gets a bit boring at the start. Anton’s on holiday with *spoilers* his wife and child *spoilers over* and eventually gets caught up investigating in the forest because some kids saw a talking wolf and were saved by a ‘botanist’. Again, the Inquisition gets involved. Also, lots of stuff is revealed about the nature of magic.

The final story is probably disappointing mostly for not tying up the series (This isn’t as much of a problem now that I know about Final Watch, but still…). The end just doesn’t feel special enough. Both the endings from the previous two books are more impressive and have better twists. Not to say the story is bad, the reveals are quite good. I was a little put off by the re-use of a plot element from The Night Watch right at the end, but that’s probably just me. It was pretty cool seeing the *spoilers* Inquisition and the Watches collaborate, as well as Anton’s reasoning over the nature of the Watches and their relationship with each other and the Inquisition. *spoilers over*

The book as a whole just doesn’t quite measure up to the first two. The plot doesn’t seem quite so intricate and the fact that the Watches work alongside one another takes away some of the joy in seeing Gesar and Zabulon plotting against one another.

-Vyperchild

** So, it seems The Day Watch will remain my favourite. At least until I get to read The Final Watch. Frigging ‘Sequel to the Night Watch trilogy’. The fuck is that? **

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Chaos Gods

August 26, 2009

It’s been a while since I did any Warhammer related posts (btw, the only progress on my Daemons is that the box is assembled), so now I’m giving a brief, introductory look at the Chaos Gods, although I will go through some of the subtleties of each God also.

Firstly, the Chaos Gods are present in both Warhammer systems. Even though Warhammer and Warhammer 40,000 have been separated from one another in canon, the Warp and daemonic beasties are shared between the games.

Secondly, the Chaos Gods are essentially certain basic emotions given a malevolent incorporeal form. For example, Slaanesh is the embodiment of desire and pleasure. Some of the Gods don’t fit this mould quite as easily, such as Tzeentch or the minor Gods. Anyway, on to the analysis.

Khorne, the Blood God, is the God of war and anger and murder and cutting things till there is no longer room to make an incision. Khorne thrives on wanton slaughter and, with the scale of wars in the Warhammer universes, he is most often the strongest of the 4 Major Chaos Gods. One thing many people don’t realise however is that Khorne isn’t just about slaughter. Although Games Workshop have exaggerated the KILL MAIM BURN side of Khorne in recent years, there are still some examples of the old Khorne and his subtle aspects. These include honour (which is the reason Khorne disdains sorcery), skill and the wish to be challenged. That is to say, while most people expect all Khorne worshippers to be raging maniacs with chainaxes running frenziedly into the enemy battle line, there is a precedent for Khorne followers who use ranged weaponry. It’s a rather fun thing to point out to all the people who complain about Khorne’s apparent two-dimensional personality.

Tzeentch, the God of Change, is the God of magic and manipulation and is sometimes related to hope. Tzeentch is a master manipulator who often creates unnecessarily complicated plots for his own amusement. In fact, it is suggested that Tzeentch is prolonging the victory of Chaos indefinitely so that he can keep playing. As the God of magic, Tzeentch is Khorne’s opposite, and also often the most powerful of the four Gods. He’s also the most complicated of the Ruinous Powers, as he isn’t tied directly to an emotion, except possibly hope, which brings up more complications anyway.

Nurgle, the God of Decay, is the God of diseases, despair and potentially also love in a really creepy way. Grandfather Nurgle, as he is known to his followers, is a nurturing God who rewards worshippers with his latest concoction, which will more than likely kill them. Nurgle also thrives on war like Khorne, in that he draws from despair (which battles of attrition in particular have plenty of), and also the environment in some wars is a perfect breeding ground for new poxes.

Slaanesh, the Prince of Pleasure, is the last and youngest of the Major Gods and is the God of pleasure and lust and decadence. Slaanesh came into existence when the Eldar (ninja space elves) empire collapsed due to orgies and art. Well, pretty much. Slaaneshi cultists are over-indulgent and find a myriad of ways to enhance their experiences. One example of this is Sonic Blasters, which allow music to be harnessed as a weapon. Another example is the mutilations that many followers of Slaanesh inflict upon themselves, such as removing their eyelids.

There are other Gods, as I’ve implied with the term ‘Major’, but I won’t say much about them. Only Malal is really interesting, but Games Workshop haven’t owned the rights to him in over a decade. Although now they are trying to work Malice into their games, as a replacement. Malal is interesting in that he is the anti-Chaos Chaos God. Basically he’s the side of Chaos that fights against Chaos. Fun stuff.

-Vyperchild

** I’ve finished Twilight Watch now, so expect a review soon.”

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Pyramids

August 25, 2009

So I was going to read Terry Pratchett’s Pyramids (after Twilight Watch) but some cocksucker at the library requested it so I couldn’t renew it.

Fucking library.

Although it did give me a reason to get some Death Note and also Kafka on the Shore. I would have gotten the next volume of Black Cat but some cocksucker borrowed it.

I have a feeling there is just one guy that borrows things just to spite me.

It is probably YOU.

/glare

-Vyperchild

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I WUV PARAPROSDOKIANS

August 24, 2009

A paraprosdokian is a literary device wherein the meaning of the first part of the sentence is changed by the latter half.

Basically, you expect one thing, and then BAM – the sentence fucks your brain.

EXAMPLE:

"I haven’t slept for ten days, because that would be too long." – Mitch Hedberg

The first part of the sentence implies that Mitch has been awake for the past ten days, however the second part forces you to re-evaluate the first part to “I have never slept for ten days straight”.

EXAMPLE 2:

"I belong to no organized party. I am a Democrat." – Will Rogers.

The first sentence seems to indicate that Will is not a member of a group, however the second sentence reveals that the key word was ‘organized’.

So, what does this mean? Not much. I just enjoy the way language can be abused in this way. Makes for clever humour that isn’t necessarily drowning in irony.

-Vyperchild